JEST

By virtue of Hunter's approval of KLIM's egg sandwich late on Friday night/early Saturday morning at the Fox Den of Bethesda, KLIM claims to have emerged victorious over SNOW in the JEST (Junto Egg Sandwich Throwdown). To that, I say, "Poppycock!"

KLIM has already broken-- like a thin-shelled egg-- the negotiated and mutually agreed-upon terms of the August 14, 2006 JEST Treaty, and therefore his claim is deemed null and void, meritless on account of the following crystal-clear pre-established parameters violated in the wee hours on Saturday:
- JEST was to be held on a Sunday (during "Meet the Press")
- Location was to be neutral, at the Poofany Palace of Arlington -- no home-kitchen advantage
- Location (Poofany Palace) was chosen also to support creation of kosher and non-kosher egg sandwich options, a prospect (thanks to the Poofany-procured separate sets of utensils and pans) unavailable at any other Junto domicile
- With KLIM's home-kitchen advantage, I would have (had I weakly given in to KLIM's attempts at luring me into an ill-conceived decision to compete) not been allowed my personal choice of my own favoured mini-whisks, seasoned pans, spatulas, pint glasses, ingredients, and utensils of my choosing, putting me at a distinct disadvantage. Disenfranchising me of these utensils would have constituted a blatant thumb of KLIM's rosy, Cape Cod wind-nipped nose and an explicit violation of the Treaty of 8/14.

Per the above, KLIM clearly has little respect for the rule of law in matters of Junto fair play, and his kitchen-cowboy diplomacy has no place in a setting of dignified discourse such as Friday night's Junto meeting. If he, upon reviewing this critique, finds that he still wants a piece of my never-beaten-in-competition egg sandwich, he can refer to the above rules and-- finding them agreeable-- negotiate a date and time (with Poobah as landlord, Hunter as chief Juge-Arbitre, and yours-truly as his esteemed competition) for a contest that will stand up in the sun-dripped light of the time-honoured, respectful dignified fairness favoured by Benjamin Franklin (in his day, God smile upon him).